6. Angels Landing

I was sitting here this morning in the present time, thinking about Utah and our trip last year- feeling like it was ages ago. I yearn to travel right now. My fellow travelers feel this longing like I do. Here we are in a worldwide pandemic and most of us have had and will have more time off then we’ve ever had in our lives. Under normal circumstances if I had this much time off it would be because I had an epic trip planned. A sprinter van and the road trip to end all road trips or the European gap year that American’s just don’t do. I did not think I’d be sitting in my house playing Pirates of the Caribbean Monopoly and day drinking. Or eating my weight in baked goods. I’m on my second “lockdown” of sorts- my day job is currently outlawed. I never thought I’d be saying that. I’m a hairdresser for goodness sake- what’s criminal about that? Anyway, this time around there is no Monopoly or day drinking, my husband is back to work and I’ve told myself that I may not bake. I’m filled with anxiety and the desperate need to get away where there is no cell phone reception. Since I cannot do that I’ve decided the next best thing is to dive back into my retelling of our trip last year. I left off in Zion, a place I wish fiercely that I was presently in. I’m going to put myself out of cell phone service by turning it off, grabbing a big cup of coffee and closing my eyes. It’s time to return to the heavenly place that is Zion National Park. Those yearning for travel why don’t you join me? Maybe, just maybe we can both be transported for a little while...

The alarm cut through our sleep. It was the first time we had to use one on this trip. After a restless night, morning came quickly. I had been a bundle of nerves (both good and bad) about our plans for that day. We wanted to make it onto the first shuttle of the day. We needed to get to the trailhead early. I had been advised that it was probably the most popular hike in the park. If we didn’t want  to wait in line just to get on the trail we needed the earliest start possible. 

One of the shuttle stops was located right outside our hotel. All we had to do was walk out to the little bus stop right at the curb. Sitting on that bench eating a banana with legs stretched out before me, crossed at the ankles I contemplated the months of prep work for this very moment. Zion was the reason I had been on the treadmill for 2 hours a day, 6 days a week. I had some trails to walk and some hills to climb. I’m not naturally an athletic person, truth be told I don’t actually enjoy being active. This might come as a shock to some people, considering the fact that I’m always walking, but I actually don’t like hiking. I love being outdoors and I do like a gentle stroll but I hate huffing and puffing and doing strenuous activity. Why do I do it, then? Because I want to love it. I want to be that person who lives an active life and makes the choice to lace up my sneakers and take off for a jog. Make no mistake, I’m miserable while I’m doing it. If you see me jogging, just know that I am cursing the world silently. I do it for the feeling I get afterwards- there is nothing better than the feeling after I’ve pushed myself to my physical limits and survived. I do it to challenge myself and prove to myself that I can be that person. 

With that knowledge tucked into your belt you’d think I would have chosen a river walk to start our journey. Nope, it’s what I wanted but not how I operate. I chose one of the hardest and most most challenging ones in the park. Am I am masochist? Perhaps. But really it is just called being stubborn. I refuse to let my physical limitations get in the way. It’s mind over matter. Daniel frequently comments on the fact that even when my body isn’t able my mind is beyond willing. I am a determined person. I push myself beyond my capabilities sometimes. I need to prove that I can do literally anything I put my mind to, which isn’t always realistic and sometimes ends in injury. 

I was both nervous and excited to do the Angels Landing trail. It’s a Class 3 trail which doesn’t sound too bad until you research it. Class 3 is the last class before you require climbing ropes. If you look the trail up you’ll find many warnings about it’s difficulties and the fact that they don’t recommend you attempt it unless you are in shape. I figured my 5 months of “training” was going to be good enough. I was excited to stretch myself and also to conquer it. I had no doubt in my mind that I would finish this hike (except I knew I wasn’t going to do the last quarter mile of chains, my fear of heights is definitely a limitation I’ve accepted). Boy was I wrong. This one’s a doozy.

Every story needs an antagonist, right? Since mine had already gotten on a plane to dear old Blighty this new one volunteered to take his place. Can an antagonist be an inanimate object? Well, in this story it can. Standing at 1,488 feet my opponent is a tall glass of water and with an elevation of nearly 6,000 feet he’ll take your breath away, quite literally.  I was pumped.

We boarded the nearly empty shuttle, took some seats and watched as it got more crowded with each stop. The shuttle from the town takes you to the Visitor’s Center and from there you take a separate shuttle to your trail head. We learned pretty quickly that our hotel was only 1/2 a mile from the visitors center, so we didn’t take the shuttle from town after this day. 

Our timing couldn’t have been better to go to Zion. The weather was amazing and the crowds were there but not dense.  It made the whole thing manageable- very short wait times and trails you could actually walk at your own pace without someone being in your way or you being in someone else’s way. We alighted the shuttle at the Visitor’s Center, paid our admission and got oriented. Zion National Park is used to throngs of people-they know how to manage the hordes and they also know how to signpost everything so even a toddler knows where to find the correct line to be in. As someone who gets lost in my own backyard I appreciate this.

Our wait was mercifully short for the shuttle that would take us to The Grotto, where you start the trailhead for Angel’s Landing. The shuttles are such a great place to people watch. They’ll full to the brim with people from all walks of life, ages and abilities. I saw serious hiking boots, flip flops, and Birkenstock’s. It made me feel better about my choice of just a regular running shoe- I fell somewhere right in the middle of preparedness. (Future me cringes at my choice of shoes, I now own the proper footwear for a hike like Angels Landing and boy was I making it a lot harder for myself that day.)

Both Daniel and I found ourselves paying special attention to a group that got on after we did and sat just ahead of us on the shuttle. Were we eavesdropping? Maybe. I like to call it curiosity.  This was the most wholesome group I’ve ever seen. Everyone was healthy and athletic with sparkling white teeth- not because they have a Hollywood dentist but because those pristine teeth hadn’t seen a cup of coffee. The group consisted of two sisters and their respective partners and one of the sister’s 2 small children. Those children were in these large and intricate hiking carriers complete with nets to keep out bugs. They looked heavy and cumbersome. One of the children tried everything to get out of his and the other succeeded. I kept marveling at the fact that two of those adults had to carry those kids on their backs while hiking, presumably up a hill. I felt a little less confident about my skills. Maybe I am just playing at being this kind of person? Right in front of me was the very definition of health and fitness. Slender, lean muscles, athletic bootie shorts, bright white smiles and all the proper equipment. Excuse me, Ranger? I may have made a mistake and gotten onto the wrong bus. Is this bound for the library?

Ascending the bus at The Grotto I braced myself for the hike of my life. Hiking polls in hand we walked across the bridge that crosses the North Fork Virgin River. A little aside here. I can’t even tell you how amazing it was to hear running water! As a native Californian who frequently experiences drought, hearing running water or seeing a full river just rushing passed you is a big deal.  We stopped on the bridge for just a moment to take it in. It felt surreal to be in that landscape. We remarked many times that we felt like we were on a movie set with a painted backdrop. It didn’t look real. 

Onward we went towards the Kayenta Trail which connects to the West Trail, which will eventually lead to the actual Angels Landing Trail. The hike had begun and I was grinning ear to ear. We hadn’t even gained any elevation yet but the views were insane. 

I realized pretty quickly that all of my work on the treadmill was not going to help me. Daniel swears it improved my pace, which might have been true but boy did my heart rate elevate quickly. I had the strength in my legs for sure but my lungs were pissed. I was out of breathe pretty quickly- I hate that feeling more than anything. It’s one of the reasons that I think I’ll never truly become a runner. Once I start huffing and puffing I shut down. Nope, no thanks. I like breathing clearly too much. Having said all of that- did I stop? No. I had no intention of stopping at any point during this hike. I took brief water breaks but never did I want to give up and go back. Up we kept traveling and the view just got better and better. It’s as worth all of the lung pain in the world. 

Remember that family I mentioned above? While I was questioning what a safe heart rate was and had I surpassed it, here comes the pristine athletic people from the shuttle passing me to the left!  They were laughing! Laughing while I struggled to keep my breathing in check. Who were these superhuman people? And I might add, two of them were carrying those children in the heavy carriers like it was nothing. I mean, we looked like we were on completely different trails. If you looked at them you’d think we were on level ground. I’m not going to lie, my morale faltered. I cursed them for looking like they were a walking commercial for an anti-chafing stick. We had just come up the first set of switchbacks and had gained some elevation at this point, my lungs hurt and Daniel was having to pause frequently so I could catch up with his damned long legs. There they were not even huffing and puffing. They had enough breath in their lungs to chortle while I could just wheeze at best. If ever there was a moment I was ready to stop and just go home that was it. But, I kept going- a lot less confident in my stride, but I did keep on. 

Fortunately you can’t dwell on things like that for long when you are surrounded by the most stunning natural beauty you will ever see and a trail that keeps going on ahead. We turned a corner and saw the most spectacular vista. I quickly let go of judging myself and my abilities and just felt nothing but gratitude for what I saw before me. Not everyone is going to experience this view in their lives and I knew that. It was an honor and suddenly I became very thankful for my body getting me as far as it had. Looking out over this scene before me I came to understand why it was named Zion, the kingdom of heaven. Whether you are religious or not you can not deny the divine beauty in this landscape. I’ve mentioned this before but the colors are unlike anything I had seen. Soft, muted purples and greys mixed with strong terra-cotta, white and vibrant green. Colors you would not put together if you were designing a home interior but nature blends them to perfection and it just makes sense!

Further up the trail we went, eventually there was no longer a sheer drop to the valley below but a towering wall of rock, and a babbling stream to our left. Instantly we were transformed to yet another new world with shade and lush trees. The path started to level out a bit, more of a gentle slope up, a slow and steady climb. It was at this point I started to get the familiar nagging catch in my knee. It starts out like a quiet burning and then it becomes increasingly painful to bend it. If I don’t heed the warning it becomes excruciating and impossible to bend at all. I have been hiking before where both knees will do it and I literally have to walk like Frankenstein’s monster, stiff with straight legs. It hurts like hell but it’s funny to behold- like, if it wasn’t happening to me I’d be laughing. But you know, it *is* happening to me so I don’t laugh, in fact I’ve cried. Let me cut away from Angels Landing for a moment to tell you of my finest trail moment (please read that with overflowing sarcasm). 

Envision a grueling hike with very little to no shade that gains elevation quickly, not quite as unrelenting as Angels Landing but very close. I couldn’t find a class for it but it is categorized as “hard” on several hiking websites. I had previously had a negative experience on this hike, so this particular time I had a score to settle. I would not let this steep terrain best me once again. I made my way up with far more ease this second time. I was feeling pretty good- I would redeem myself! In fact I stopped to take a triumphant photo on the way up as proof that I was winning! We took in the magnificent view at the top and prepared to head down the peak and continue the loop back to the parking lot. I think I failed to mention that the way down is steep. We could have chosen to double back and go down the way we came. Did we? No. Should we have? Hell, yes! What followed was one of the most excruciating experiences of my life (apart from my 3 month experience with severe sciatica). Fortunately I had the forethought to have hiking poles with me- I had caved and purchased a pair when I realized that I had reached that point in my life that they were no longer something to make fun of. Those babies are the only reason you didn’t hear about this hike on the news. I kid you not, if I had not had those hiking poles I would have been airlifted off that stupid hillside and you all would have known it. 

Triumphant photos lol. 

It started off with one knee locking up, causing me to limp for a good quarter mile. Then very shortly the other knee started to complain and then lock up as well. When I say “lock up” I am not kidding. My knees will not bend to save my life. I had to lean all of my weight on those hiking poles almost like crutches as I sobbed from the pain. Daniel went on ahead not realizing exactly how bad things were with me. He stopped at one point to wait for me to catch up. He saw my feet first as I rounded a corner and came down the trail from above. There I was, walking slowly with legs locked straight (again picture Frankensteins Monster, or a shuffling mummy), kind of swinging them out to the side with each step, tears streaming down my face. He couldn’t help himself, he burst out laughing. It was not what he was expecting to see at all. If I had been closer I might have hit him with a hiking pole. Before you demand that I get a divorce he did redeem himself quickly and try to help me, with genuine concern.   That hike back to the car was the longest walk ever. I think my pace was under 2 miles an hour, a tortoise could have passed and left me in his dust. It was grueling but also had a hint of comedy. I was very aware of what I looked like and how the scene was playing out. There was a very Monty Python quality to it. I vowed never to return to that trail. I learned my lesson, the peak had won and I had accepted it. Fast forward about 5 years, many moderate trails, 5 and 10K races, 17 miles around the city of Edinburgh with only a whisper of knee trouble. 

Feeling like I might actually be free of the worst of my knee issues I kept trudging the ascent of Angels Landing. The knee pain usually only happens when I’m going downhill so I was perplexed when it started while still on the uphill. I gave Daniel “the look” which he knows means the knee is about to go, but I wanted to keep going. Just around the corner was “Walter’s Wiggles” and then Scout Lookout which was our intended destination. You guys, I was *right* there!! Like, I could smell it! Wisely Daniel remembered our experience from 5 years earlier. When I protested that I wanted to keep going he stopped me in my tracks by saying, “You don’t want to be helicoptered out of here, do you?”.  Oh boy, did that snap me out of stubborn trance. He was right. I had my poles but there was no way I could have a repeat of that hike on the very crowded and very narrow Angels Landing trail. Sometimes the best thing is to just admit defeat. This was one of those moments where no matter how much I was mentally prepared for this hike my body was not going to have it. This was not the time to push myself past discomfort, I was risking serious and possibly permanent injury.

While turning around was a big disappointment it was the right thing to do. My knee complained on the way down but only a twinge compared to that previous experience. I lived to see another day of hiking. 

The way down the Angels Landing trail affords some stunning views. When making my ascent I tend to have tunnel vision- looking ahead or looking at my feet, lets be honest, trying to catch my breathe. There are views that I just didn’t see even though they were right there. Facing the other direction it was all laid out before me. The view is unreal. It looks like a painted backdrop. There is one particular view that sticks in my mind when I think of Zion. Picture yourself standing almost a thousand feet up at this point on the trail looking out over a verdant valley below. A river snakes through it as well as the well worn tracks of multiple trails. Rusty orange peaks tower above the valley and contrast with the bright blue, cloudless sky. The light plays on the sandstone making it red, purple, orange, white and brown all at the same time- it’s mesmerizing. The awe inspiring peak directly ahead of you is called the Mountain of the Sun. It is majestic. Words like majestic and magnificent were invented for peaks like this- it dominates the view. The arch on the west facing side (which is our view of it) catches the sun first thing in the morning and last thing at night. No matter where I was in the park if the Mountain of the Sun was in view my eyes kept being drawn to it. 

Mountain of the Sun and heading down the trail 

Lumbering down the trail at a slow and steady pace, allowing Daniel to go on ahead I found myself suddenly having to hug the wall along with a fellow hiker. We plastered ourselves, arms outstretched against the rock face as we suddenly heard pounding footsteps and laughter coming from behind us. A young guy came bounding past us, running at speed with his arms flailing. This was not a controlled run of an experienced trail runner, this was the chaotic run of someone going downhill that couldn’t stop themselves even if they wanted to. The fellow hiker plastered to the wall with me turned to me and said, “Now, that’s how you get yourself killed.” I couldn’t agree more. That guy was so lucky that he didn’t trip on his own damned feet, a rock, or run into someone as he went down the trail. It’s a long way down if you falter and I don’t think many people survive it. 

We made it back across the river to the grotto and decided to have our picnic lunch amongst the trees before walking the trail to the lodge. The Zion National Park Lodge is exactly how you’d imagine a mountain lodge to be. It is located within the park boundaries  and pretty secluded, expect when overrun with visitors. I looked into staying there for this trip but it was definitely over our budget. In future though I’d like splurge and stay there next time, I think it would be magical to stay within the park. 

At this point we studied the map to find our next trailhead. The day was still really young and we decided to follow up Angels Landing with the incredibly easy Emerald Pools trail. The middle and upper pools were closed due to a 2010 rockslide that continues to be unstable so we could only hike to the lower pools. The only real drawback to this trail is it is crowded. You can’t be in a hurry on this trail and you better have some patience in your reserves. Because this is an easy trail there were all levels of hikers, so be prepared to get stuck behind someone with a walker or a small child that has been left to wander it on foot. Since I was so excited to see the pools I was able to keep my frustration in check but I honestly wouldn’t do it again unless I was able to get there as soon as the sun came up. It’s hard to appreciate the natural beauty surrounding you when you’re concentrating on not running into the person in front of you. We were able to finally find a bit of solitude by walking all the way to the end of the trail before it closed off. Watching the water from the waterfalls above was absolutely magical- the light hit them just right and they twinkled.  I can only imagine what it would be like during our current shelter at home, empty and peaceful. I hope the employees of the park are able to take advantage of the park being closed and enjoy all of the trails and wonders in total solitude. 

With that days hiking done we caught the shuttle back to Springdale and the visitors center. There is a great little coffee shop called Perks in the visitors center complex. It became our coffee place of choice over the next few days. There’s nothing quite like sipping on a latte admiring The Watchman towering at a distance. 

The best thing about getting up early is getting in all of your hiking by lunch time. This left us the rest of the day to relax or if you’re me to head straight for the swimming pool. If there is a pool then you will find me in it. I do leisurely laps, float, pretend to be a synchronized swimmer, you know the usual things people do in pools. It is my happy place and after walking 22,643 steps by 1pm I deserved to just float in nothingness. We also deserved margaritas which we found in short order. The other good thing about a day of serious hiking? You don’t feel guilty about eating all the things. We plopped ourselves down in the patio of Casa de Amigos, ordered margaritas and ate our fill. Vacation calories don’t count, right?

I must admit I slept well that night. I was tired and happy and knew we had a good day of (moderate) hiking ahead of us. Zion had more treasures to be found.